HanSarang Thoughts #12: The Demons in All of Us

Earlier, I spoke that there is an artist that lives inside all of us but within that statement lies the uncomfortable fact that many of us don’t want to express anything because we hold so much within ourselves. Heartbreaks, misery, depression, rage, loss, all of these burdens we keep within ourselves. There is the great value in confiding with our loved ones, for those who understand the undeniable truth that no human being can live with so much heaviness in their heart.

Sometimes, letting others know of our pain is not enough. Sometimes, the pain is so great that words do it no justice. Sometimes, it needs to come out in a lion’s roar, a ferocious dance, a possessed violin solo, or in a film where one can transform that burning energy into something positive.

But what if the things we hold within ourselves are the things we are most afraid of? Beyond just extreme emotions, what if they are repressed memories, memories of our past that we are not too proud about? The aspects of ourselves that if others knew, they would call us a monster or a psychopath? Should we keep those within ourselves, always afraid of the darkness that lies within us?

I believe that the greatest strength lies in being honest about our weaknesses. Strength comes from the ability to express our deepest flaws…our darkest demons that we hold at bay. When we can make peace with our demons, when we can embrace them as being one of the defining forces that shape who we are as individuals, that is expression at its finest.

Expression, especially when dealing with the darker colors in our lives, can come out extremely raw. We all like to think that art is clean and refined and while there is a place for that, I find it infinitely more interesting when I can literally see the blunt edges and the imperfections. Of course, as time goes by, you can take that mass and chisel it but it is crucial to accept that the ability to express the things we hold tight within ourselves is a tremendous victory and a beautiful one at that as well.

I say all of these things because I have found salvation in letting myself go and all of the bad experiences I’ve had throughout my life. It came in the form of spoken poetry and instead of explaining it, I will show it:

Several years in the making with this piece shown being the final version, I have been blessed to show the various versions through people who were willing to listen and contribute. We think there isn’t anyone out there who will care, but believe me, there are. And they can come from places you least expect.

To this day, I feel like I am growing younger even though my body is growing older. Art, expression, these are the things that truly can make one’s soul be forever young and vibrant.

So the demons you put at arm’s length…I dare you to give them a hug. Hear them out. Hear what they have to say and you in return, express it. Put all fears aside and be bold to be vulnerable. You will be very much surprised at how many people will be going through the same things you are 🙂

Advertisements

2 comments

  1. Aloe-Jade · June 13, 2012

    i am touched by your thoughts. i am having trouble letting go while at the same time embracing my demons. i wonder what it truly means to be able to do this? i’m not a fan of my demons but am still working my way towards understanding that they are a necessary part of myself? (ugh it makes my skin crawl to think of that as truth but i know it is to some extent). how can i begin truly rethinking this?

    • eddlyhong · June 13, 2012

      i challenge you to take a pen and paper, and start writing. But when you write, do not take the pen off the page and therefore it does not allow you to go back and fix anything you wrote before. Whatever is repressing you or keeping you down, this is one way to release what is pent up within you. Try that out and let me know how that goes 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s