HanSarang Thoughts #3: The Art of Pissing People Off Royally And Apologizing Sincerely For It

I am a very passionate, stubborn man who can get gassed up extremely easily. When I get gassed up, my pride and arrogance get out of control and I start taking important matters for granted, for example, my friends. I say things that I say in extreme emotional spite that would’ve been much better said if I took an hour or so to think about what I was going to say. In other situations, I make jokes at their expense, not realizing that the joke wasn’t appropriate at all and that the joke wasn’t even funny in the first place.

Both situations get me digging some incredibly deep holes. This is the price I pay for wearing my emotions on my sleeves and for being the extremely blunt and honest guy that I am. One would say that while nothing is wrong with being an individual who wear their emotions on their sleeves, one must also know how to keep secrets.

I seem to have a huge issue with secrets, however. I fucking hate secrets. I want it all exposed out in the open so we can deal with each other’s true self in all our glorious and shittastic qualities. I would be the guy who would value WikiLeaks and see absolute joy in all the nations’ dirty secrets out in the open and everybody in the world having to deal with each other’s dirty laundries. But it’s this issue that makes me so aggravating in that I must poke & prod these secrets out of people. Not only secrets but whatever they seem to be holding against me, for whatever reason that may to be my benefit or none of my business. This is the equivalent of me slamming a stick into a sensitive beehive and repeating the poke over and over and over again.

More holes that I end up digging for myself, this time the variation being that a whole colony of angry bees come swarming out and sting the living daylights out of me. I am only thankful I don’t do this on a frequent daily basis and usually comes when I get so full of myself.

What I am most thankful for is that while I have the extraordinary gift of pissing people off, I thankfully have the gift of apologizing and apologizing truly. If I didn’t have this aspect  I would honestly believe that 90% of my closest friends would have given up on me a long time ago. That would’ve been a lonely world, alright…being cursed to be extremely good at raising hell and having everybody desert you because of it.

I guess I still have a lot to learn, even at the age of 25. I would hopefully think that at this age I would be an all-knowing, all-patient, all-charming wonderful human being. Clearly, this is not the case.

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One comment

  1. Sherry J · June 7, 2012

    hey eddy,
    i m soo happy that your breathing life back on your site again!!!
    i was a little worried that april would be the last time i hear from you cause it was poetry month and i just thought that was going to be that, but now im reading all these awesome, raw, yet funny entires from you and my heart is fill with glee!!!

    keep it up eddy and continue to follow your dreams and meet your goals!!!

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