so i haven’t had this feeling in a while
this feeling of extremely high expectations,
where I expect my friends to drop their time for me
and watch me perform and exercise my vanity.
because honestly, that’s what it is,
if i am to get right down to the nitty gritty,
i am greedy for my friend’s attentions,
the more i get,
the more i am pleased.
when i see that there is a small turnout of my friends,
i become upset, not because of who didn’t show,
but at myself for spending so much time
and creating this large bubble of expectation
that they are going to cater to my needs
and satisfy my wants of being noticed and loved.
damn, i’m greedy.
gotta remember that
expectations are quite lethal.